Monday Mourning -- Not Because of How We Feel

Many of you know that the While We're Waiting ministry hosts a Facebook page.  Actually, we host two Facebook pages -- a public one, which we encourage anyone who is interested in this ministry to "like" and follow -- and a private one, with membership limited just to parents who have lost a child.

 
Something amazing has been going on on that private page this month.

While the rest of Facebook has been filled with posts from people doing their obligatory "30 Days of Thanks" during the month of November ... stating their thankfulness for everything from the health of their children to the fact that the lines at Wal-Mart were short on that particular day ... the members of the "While We're Waiting -- Support for Bereaved Parents" page have been sharing the things they're grateful for as well.

And the list has been nothing short of astounding.  And humbling.

The fact that these statements of thanks come from hearts which have been crushed into pieces make them all the more precious.  I believe that they are a sweet aroma to the Lord, made all the sweeter by the sacrifice required to see these things as gifts from Him.

Here is just a peek into this amazing list.  These parents are thankful:

• for the fog of grief that helped them survive the initial days, weeks, and months after their child's death
• that their child is no longer suffering from physical illness, addiction, or mental illness; or for those who died young, that they never experienced heartache
• that they already had appropriate clothing to wear to the funeral; or that they had friends who helped "dress them"
• for their dog, who forced them to get outside every day for walks
• for the opportunity to be transparent and authentic with their surviving children
• for co-workers who did not expect them to be "back to normal" right away
• that their son had not had a haircut recently so they could save a lock of his hair
• for people who opened their homes so extended family had a place to stay around the time of the funeral
• for items they found after their child's death with their child's handwriting on them
• for a friend who brought their son a birthday cake after his death 
• for a friend who brought toilet paper to their home
• that their child died in their own backyard
• that their child died doing something he or she loved
• that they were able to hold their child as she took her last breaths
• for supportive teachers and administrators at their child's school
• for friends who organized pictures, details, etc., for their child's funeral
• for their child's salvation
• that their child's death makes the need for a Savior so very real
• for people who began a relationship with Jesus or renewed that relationship because of their child's death
• that their last words to their child were, "I love you."

Not exactly the typical "What I'm Thankful For" list we often hear at this time of year.

The picture above, from Ann Voskamp, perfectly captures what is happening here.  These parents are thankful to God, not because of how they feel, but because of Who He is.  I've made that picture my Facebook profile picture this month, just to remind myself of the truth of it.

Many of these precious folks also expressed thankfulness for the While We're Waiting ministry, and I can't tell you how humble and grateful that makes me feel.  WWW is a gift God has given us as part of our healing process after Hannah's homegoing, and we feel privileged that He has entrusted us with it.  

May we always be thankful to God for Who He is, and not because of how we feel.

While We're Waiting Wednesday -- WWW Retreat for Bereaved Parents

Once again, God did above and beyond all that we could ask or imagine at our While We're Waiting Retreat for Bereaved Parents this past weekend!  Two of our couples had to cancel at the last minute, but we still had a wonderful group of moms and dads.  What a blessing it was to hear the stories of their precious children ... something we consider a sacred privilege.

As always, the story is best told through pictures.

Family Farm is beautiful any time of the year, but I especially love it in the fall.

It just so happened that the infamous polar vortex, bringing record cold temperatures to Arkansas, coincided with our weekend together.  There was literally frost on the pumpkin on Saturday morning!

We didn't spend as much time outside as we usually do, thanks to the unseasonable chill, but we did visit the animals ...

And a few brave folks took a trip down Slide Mountain ...

But we spent most of our time inside by the cozy fireplace.  Discussing issues faced by bereaved parents ...

Sharing the stories of our precious kids ...

And, of course, eating lots of good food prepared by our awesome chef ...

One of the highlights of the weekend, and a first for our While We're Waiting Weekend, took place on Saturday evening.  After dinner we went outside and launched sky lanterns. We talked about how these lanterns were flat and lifeless when we took them out of the packages, kind of like our lives when we are grieving. But, as the warmth of the flame filled them, they began to rise and give light for all to see. We discussed how we wanted to live our lives as lights in the world, in honor of both our children and our Lord.  It was a very special time.

We wrapped up this event on Sunday morning with a time of praise and worship, along with an object lesson to help us remember some of the things we discussed over the course of the weekend.

And this group of folks, who were complete strangers to one another on Friday evening, left as close friends, bound together by our love for our children and for our Savior.

Can't wait for our next While We're Waiting Weekend!

Our While We're Waiting Weekends for Bereaved Parents are offered at no cost to the attendees.  If you're interested in attending one of these events, please click here for more information.  Or, if you'd like to make a tax-deductible donation to While We're Waiting so that we can continue to offer events like this, please click here.

While We're Waiting Wednesday -- An Update!

It's been awhile since I've posted an updated on the While We're Waiting ministry ... so I'm going to take advantage of a quiet evening at home to try to catch you up.

There's been a lot going on!  We continue to host retreat events for bereaved parents every few months ... some here in Arkansas, and some on the road.  Our most recent parents' weekend was in Wichita Falls, Texas, and we were blessed to meet some wonderful moms and dads there.  We were so grateful to Ron and Kathleen Duncan, who opened their home to our group for that event.  We have two more "on the road" parents' weekends on the schedule, one in northwest Arkansas in February, which is already completely booked, and one in Madison, Mississippi, in June.

We have Mini-Retreats for Bereaved Moms on the calendar in January, March, and June.  January and March are already full, but we have a few openings left for our June 27th date.  We've got a Dads' Weekend scheduled for the last weekend in April, and the guys are really looking forward to that event.

We will be kicking off a Parents' Weekend at our "home" site, Family Farm, in just ten days.  This event has been completely booked for several months now, and there are moms and dads from six different states who will be in attendance.  We cannot wait to meet these parents and hear their children's stories.

Attendance at our monthly support group meetings continues to increase each month.  It's hard to say that that's a good thing, because we sincerely wish there was no need for a group like this, but since there is, we are grateful that God chooses to use WWW in this way.

And since January of 2014, we've mailed 128 Hope Packages to recently-bereaved parents.  Truly a labor of love.

But here's what we're most excited about!!!

For some time now, we've felt God calling us to build a facility which will be dedicated to serving bereaved parents through these While We're Waiting events.  Our desire has been to create a comfortable, safe, warm, home-like lodge where parents who have lost children can gather, with no need to wear a "mask", knowing that they are surrounded by those who understand.  A place where hurting moms and dads can be pointed to our one true source of hope, Jesus Christ.  A refuge, where we can encourage each other to live well while we're waiting to be reunited with our children in Heaven.

Fifty acres with an older home at the edge of Hot Springs is being donated to the While We're Waiting ministry, and that will be the site of the While We're Waiting Refuge.  It's out in the country, surrounded by acres and acres of thoroughbred farms.  Brad and Larry have been spending some of their Saturdays clearing the property ...

Can you picture a "While We're Waiting Refuge" sign hanging here at the entrance?  :-)

And just this past week, we had a drawing done of what the inside of the lodge is going to look like ...

I don't know if you can tell much from this drawing, but if you look closely, you can see the existing house at the top, with an extension drawn toward the bottom of the page which includes six 16'x16' bedrooms, each with a closet and private bath.  The driveway comes up from the bottom of the picture and curves around, circling a separate building which will have four more of these 16'x16' bedrooms.  There will be a vaulted roof area connecting the main lodge to those four bedrooms, and the driveway will go under it so folks will have a covered area in which to unload.  If you look back up to the top of the drawing, you'll see a large meeting room drawn in, which will overlook the rolling hills and pond on that part of the property.  We are having a concept drawing done now, and I can't wait to see it!

All these wonderful things require funds, and God is faithfully providing.  Our events are offered at no cost to the participants (although donations are accepted), so all of our funding comes solely from gifts and contributions.  Little by little, we've watched God grow our bank account, and we are so grateful.  

We are committed to building this facility without incurring any debt, so we are praying for more supporters who will come alongside and assist us financially (and/or physically!) with this project.  We've recently updated the donation page on our While We're Waiting website to make it easier to partner with us.  You can now choose the amount you'd like to donate, and even sign up to make a recurring donation if you choose to.  You can specify if you'd like to make your donation in memory or in honor of someone, and we'll even send a card to notify that person or that person's family of your donation if you'd like for us to do so.  It's completely secure, and because we are a 501(c)(3) nonprofit corporation, all donations are tax deductible.  We'll send you a receipt for the IRS at the end of the year.  Click here to go straight to our donation page if you'd like to be a part of this project.  

So ... Now you're all caught up on the While We're Waiting ministry.  I'm going to try to make "While We're Waiting Wednesdays" a regular feature on this blog, so if you're interested in following what God is doing in WWW, be sure to check in from time to time.  I hope to be posting a ground-breaking picture soon!