When an older loved one dies, like a grandparent, you miss that person, and you miss the life you had with that person.
But when your child dies (or a young spouse, I would imagine) you not only miss the life you had with that person ... you miss the future that you would have had with that person.
Does that make sense ... that you can "miss the future"?
This past Saturday evening, we attended the wedding of a co-worker's daughter. The wedding was a beautiful affair, complete with a glowing bride and beaming groom, numerous smiling attendants, proud parents and grandparents, and a lavishly appointed reception.
And as I sat and watched the nuptials unfold, all I could think about was how much I missed the future.
-- I missed the son-in-law whom I will never meet.
-- I missed going wedding dress shopping and finding that "perfect" dress.
-- I missed all the wedding preparations ... showers, invitations, music, flowers, cakes, etc.
-- I missed hearing Brad say, "Her mother and I", in response to the pastor's question.
-- I missed "You may kiss the bride."
-- I missed the cutting of the cake.
-- I missed the leaving for the honeymoon.
-- I missed the grandchildren who will never be born.
And I ached for Brad, who will never walk Hannah down the aisle, and for Bethany, who will not have a sister to stand beside her as her maid of honor.
Ahhhh, but thank God there is another wedding to come in the future. And I'm not talking about Bethany's, as much as I'm looking forward to that someday (but not anytime soon!).
I'm talking about a ceremony much more elaborate and awe-inspiring than any earthly wedding. Here is what the Word of God says about that wedding...
"Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: 'Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear.'...Then the angel said to me, 'Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!' And he added, 'These are the true words of God.'" Revelation 19: 6-9 NIV
Even so, come, Lord Jesus.
Missing the future does make sense. I'm a real Anglophile and when Prince Charles and Diana got married, I got up at 3 in the morning to watch it. I was approaching 30 and struggling with the fact that I might never married. God made Ephesians 3:14 -21 (His love) plus the idea of the Wedding yet-to-be so real to me that day that I made it through Diana's wedding (and others!) with joy.
ReplyDeleteAmen!
ReplyDeleteI accidentally deleted my post before....maybe God had different plans for what I was typing...
ReplyDeleteI totally understand what you mean by "Missing the future." We have thoughts of what might have been with Matt practically daily. We had him for 15 years and 9 months here on earth. We too miss the wedding, daughter-in-law, grandbabies, etc. Right now, I am missing getting to help him shop for his first year of college/dorm life. His friends post their life experiences on Facebook and I miss him not getting to experience those things...however, with Kaitlyn, we mourn the loss of the "Dream" of the future. I carried her inside me for 8 1/2 months. All we had were dreams of what may be....either way, we still misss the future, just in different ways. I get teared up when I see anything that Matt missed, even though, somehow I think he is getting to experience so much more in Heaven...it still hurts for those of us still here waiting.... I don't think missing the future will ever change, as long as we are here.
Paula--I think you're right...we'll always miss the future while we're here. But won't that make Heaven just that much sweeter?! It doesn't really make it hurt any less, I know, but it sure is something to look forward to...
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